Okapi feet

We went to the zoo with two young humans, and returned with two okapi
instead. Both of them love their new feet.

Father-son bonding

They would stay like this endlessly if I let them. They even have
certain games(fish raising) that they're working on every day
together. It's definitely a loosing battle to try to fight it.

So this is love...

Edamame is totally smitten.

Ed: A-chan wants me.
Me: *subconsciously thinking WHAT?!?!?!?* Oh really? She wants to play?
Ed: Yeah.

Me:Who do you want to pray for tonight?
Ed: A-chan


He loves sitting next to her in Sunbeams, but her allure still isn't enough to have mommy leave during sharing time.

Laundry pile

I finally did it!! This isn't all of it. I honestly don't know how my
husband has been able to have clean underwear the last few days.

Edamame - Rice Rocket lover

While we were checking out used cars the other day Ed kept searching for Lightning McQueen. He finally 'found' him. He made an awesome choice of car I think.


mmmm...Mazda Rx-8

The guy at the dealership was so nice. He let him look inside while we checked out some minivan/wagon hybrids(not hybrid drive train, hybrid body). No decision yet, but it was nice to have started looking.

Edamame - Ladies Man

We were at a church lunch today and Edamame saw his favorite Sunbeam gal and said

"Mommy, I want to go sit by A-chan."

Mommy: Ok, go over there an ask her.

He followed her back to her chair and was going to ask but her mom came over and he got a little nervous, so I went over and told him to try again, and he did! How's that for showing no fear.

Hope he can keep this up in 20 years.

Musings and cake

First the cakes. I've been craving a Boston Cream Pie for a while. You can't get them here at all, so I made it, and DANG! I'll have to make this again, soon!




...and my super sweet Mother in Law bought a cake, whip cream and berries because she didn't think I'd make a cake for my own birthday(have been since I was 20). 007 helped her put it together the last day we were at their house this past weekend.



Ok, now onto the musings part. It's more of a frustration. I'll preface this with, I don't need or want sympathy, but rather ideas. I'm having a hard time enjoying motherhood right now. In fact it's been like this off and on for the last six months or so. I've had some blood tests done and my thyroid is functioning normally, so it isn't likely chemical. I'm just wondering what do you do to find fulfillment while raising small children? The endless housework really don't help. I'll take a picture of the ever growing tower of unfolded laundry growing upstairs. I'd like to do stuff to help Edamame, but I am lucky if I can get on my computer for 10 minutes let alone enough time to search the internet for ways to help a soon to be 4 year olds mind to develop. Plus they seem to both be going through particularly needy phases right now. I love the hugs and stuff, but if I hold one the other must be there by himself instead. I just feel like I'm near the end of a proverbial rope. I remember seeing the news stories about women who hurt their own children, and I'm afraid of ending up like that. Getting outside helps. Having groceries delivered helps a lot(it means less wrangling to the store, and more time to play). I think I'm a bit jealous of seeing people going to grad school and learning, lack of adult interaction, and loss of sleep. Anyway, what do you do to feel happy? What do you do to enjoy being with your children?('Cause mine are funny, cute, and interact fairly well together...they are great kids...and Edamame tells me I'm a nice mommy frequently). How do you help your individual worth and feelings of self worth? I know it, but how do you make it sink in? What do you do on your rough days?

It may not help, that I've recently been disenfranchised and lost my drivers license as well...Thanks a lot America! Double thanks California!